Last Updated 08 | 11 | 2012 at 08:00

Lifestyle / Sex & Relationships

Break a heart or have yours broken? It’s the DI-VE guide

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di-ve.com news
editorial@di-ve.com

Breaking up is a tricky business which, when handled incorrectly, could lead you to spending the night in hospital with bad scalds and burns all over your face and upper torso… (that’s based on a true story, you know).

But fret not – things needn’t get quite as treacherous! As we have compiled a guide on how to easily and, safely, break up with your no-longer-better-half.

1. Don't use words such as 'qalbi' or 'hanini'. People being broken up with want to be affirmed – they need to know that you weren't one big, fat mistake from the very beginning! They need to know that they have made somewhat of a difference to your life, and patronising them isn’t going to help.

2. Be honest but not too honest. There's no point in telling them that their mother is a psycho-crazy bitch or that you hate their cat, especially as you won't be seeing them again anytime soon. You're already breaking their heart, so make sure you do it nicely.

3. Never, EVER break up with someone by e-mail or SMS. Have the guts to do it face to face. It might be more difficult for you but it's the least you owe the person you're dumping.

4. There is no need to Facebook it. Making it ‘Facebook official’ will lead to your ex-relationship becoming a topic of conversation at a time when both you and the your ex might need to be alone with your thoughts and feelings.

Every break up, however, has two parts: the person who can no longer handle being in a relationship and the person who is about to get released. It's never easy for either party but there are ways to get over things in a gracious way.

1. Get things off your chest. Sit down and write everything that you've been meaning to tell your ex. Write in as much detail and length as you wish. Once you finish, bin it along with your relationship.

2. Get out of the house. Make sure you hang out with friends and get back out there. Wear something that makes you feel good about yourself and enjoy being single again.

3. Screw your ex. If you can't deal with just being friends, then don't do it. Finish off the relationship by cutting off all ties. It might not be easy but it'll definitely be worth it. Ultimately, you need to take care of yourself first, so fug-em!

Gone through a bad break-up? Or are you simply brilliant at breaking hearts? Share your story below.

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